Article first published as Book Review: Seven Ways To Die by William Diehl with Kenneth John Atchity on Blogcritics.

William Diehl was a New York Times bestselling author. He passed away almost five years ago and his last book, Seven Ways To Die, begins with a touching note written by his widow, Virginia Gunn Diehl. She writes: “He completed over four hundred pages of Seven Ways To Die. He loved this book…He was sorry that he couldn’t complete his final project. He worked so hard on it for several years. He was proud of it.”

His widow goes on to say that her husband’s friend of twenty-five years, Ken Atchity, did his best to “make sure that Bill’s book would see the light of day.” Ken Atchity is a talented author himself, having written fifteen of his own books, and he is the producer of thirty films. Atchity understood his friend’s writing style and used notes and an outline left by Bill Diehl to complete the book. Ken Atchity’s contribution doesn’t disappoint the reader and he fulfilled Virginia Diehl’s wish; that her husband’s fans would have one more opportunity to enjoy his craft.

Seven Ways To Die is a work of fiction, written in third person, published by AEI/Story Merchant Books. It’s a suspenseful, crime whodunit, laced with colorful characters and an intriguing plot. The main character, Cody, is a 30-something NYPD captain of homicide, who founded a special unit known as TAZ which stands for “The Tactical Assistance Squad.” He’s trying to catch a serial killer, all the while being hounded by a pompous crime writer named Ward Hamilton.

The reader learns that Cody grew up in Idaho on the Nez Perce Reservation. As a boy, he learned to be in tune with nature. He had a special connection, even mystical tie, with animals, and was mysteriously able to communicate with them. Cody learned at a young age to read “signs” of nature and this innate skill helped him later as a homicide detective.

We are introduced to Cody at age thirteen but the story quickly jumps to the present; Cody working Homicide with the NYPD. The author’s spine tingling descriptions make the reader feel like they are in the room with the first victim, Melinda. As the tension builds, you quickly feel Melinda’s terror and won’t want to put the book down (I had to keep flipping the pages to see what would happen next).

Bill Diehl had a powerful gift for creating images painted with his words. Be it the beautiful Nez Perce Reservation, the dark and secretive sex clubs, victim number two’s posh brownstone or the ghoulish murder scenes, each chapter descriptively sets the stage for a story that moves at top speed.

William Diehl was a master at character development. He’s able to make you feel the melancholy of the tough and now sober Detective Frank Rizzo, as he enters his small apartment, on the anniversary of his wife’s passing.

On page 160, Diehl writes:

“He got a glass, pored himself a glass of ginger ale, went in the living room and turned on the television set. When the remote turned up nothing of interest, he put on the DVD of “West Side Story” and as the overture began, he slumped down in his easy chair and let memories envelope him like a warm blanket.” (The reader learned earlier that the couple’s first date was spent seeing the movie, “West Side Story”).

The characters in this novel amuse, entertain, confuse and mesmerize. From Amelie Cluett, the exotically beautiful masseuse, to Victoria, the sexually deviant lover of crime writer and flamboyant columnist, Ward Hamilton, each character packs a punch, adding dazzle to this superb drama.

Seven Ways To Die was William Diehl’s last (literary) love and the people who loved him made sure his hard work was to no avail. It was the inspiration of Virginia Gunn Diehl, the dedication of Ken Atchity, the forensics contributions from Dr. Brett Bartlett, M.D., and the persistence and hard work of others that made Seven Ways To Die more than a suspenseful, top notch thriller. It is a labor of love, and like a diamond, it’s a brilliant and valuable gift left by Diehl and his wife to all his fans.

William Diehl

If you haven’t had the pleasure of reading any of William Diehl’s New York Times Best Sellers (Primal Fear or Sharky’s Machine), I urge you to pick up Seven Ways To Die. It’s a fabulous read and in my opinion, if ever made into a movie, would become a box office hit.

In closing, I’d like to point out that Bill Diehl dedicated Seven Ways To Die as follows: “For Virginia-She endured.” And because of Virginia’s great love for her husband, William Diehl’s last writing will endure and be enjoyed for eternity.

Please visit the author’s website and that of his wife:

Seven Ways To Die

The Virginia Gunn’s Website

Published first on Expatspost.com; “Happy Birthday Fenway Park: Boston Celebrates Fenway’s 100th Anniversary

Fenway Park is the oldest Major League Baseball stadium in the United States, having opened on April 20, 1912. On that date, the Red Sox played against the New York Highlanders (later renamed the New York Yankees) and celebrated a 7-6 victory over them. Fittingly, the Red Sox will mark 100 years of baseball at Fenway Park today when they play against the Yankees in a three part series.

If you live in the Boston area, you know that the local media has been buzzing about Fenway this week. From the Red Sox letting off 100 balloons with tickets inside the park  (Read more…) to the free 10 hour Open House at Fenway Park, where nearly 54,000 people were able to be part of history; walking the warning track, touching the Green Monster, sitting in the dugouts, even peeking inside the manual scoreboard. (Read more...)

The Boston news reminded Bostonians this week that Fenway Park is special. Some of the interesting historical facts included:

• Fenway’s original capacity was 35,000. Between 1912 and 2004, Fenway’s capacity had fluctuated between 33,000 and 36,298.
• The grandstand section has the original seats, 15 inches across, packed together and the wood on them is splintering. (I should know–I got a splinter from sitting on one of them!)
• One red seat stands out amongst a sea of green seats in the right field bleachers. That’s where Ted Williams hit the longest homerun in Fenway history, a whopping 502 feet, on June 9^th, 1946. The ball crashed through the hat of a Yankees fan sitting in his seat. After he “woke up” he was asked by reporters if he would switch his allegiance to the Sox after being hit. He said that he would and the next day’s newspaper headlines read, “Williams Knocks Sense into Yankees Fan”. The green seat the man sat in was then replaced with a red seat (Seat 21, Row 37, Section 42). The original chair is in the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, NY.
• Between 1912 and 1933 Fenway had a slope, running up to the centerfield fence. It was nicknamed “Duffy’s Cliff” after Red Sox left fielder Duffy Lewis had become skilled at running up the slope to make plays.
• In 1936, the Sox constructed a 23 foot net atop the Monster, located in left field, to protect the windows of businesses on Lansdowne Street
• After the 1975 World Series, the Sox added padding to the lower portions of the left and center field walls, after a play in the 1975 World Series. Fred Lynn had crashed into the padding-less walls to make a play.

There are many more interesting facts that make Fenway Park a legendary field. But if you’re from Boston, you know what makes Fenway is its devoted fans. Listening to scalpers, standing outside the ball park, shouting with their thick South Boston (Southie) accents tells you where you are. You’re in Boston and Boston loves Fenway Park, the home of the Red Sox for the past 100 years.

Article first published as Book Review: Freeing Yourself from Anxiety by Tamar E. Chansky, PhD on Blogcritics.

According to the ADAA, anxiety disorders are the “most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older (18% of U.S. population).” But anxiety and depression are also the most treatable of mental health conditions, according to Tamar E. Chansky, PhD,and author of Freeing Yourself from Anxiety: 4 Simple Steps to Overcome Worry and Create the Life You Want (Da Capo Press).

Dr. Chansky, a clinical psychologist, is the founder and director of the Children’s and Adult Center for OCD and Anxiety. In her book Freeing Yourself from Anxiety, she shares powerful strategies to help one change how he reacts to anxious thought and responds to stress.

In her book, she explains what anxiety is and how negative thinking causes major problems. She outlines four steps to “re-frame” anxious thought and help you mobilize; address the situation clearly and move on. Each chapter has quick exercises that summarize the main points and the book provides simple, everyday exercises that help build new ‘thinking’ skills’, which, according to this author, will help create a better life.

Chansky believes it’s never too late to change negative thinking patterns. “The fact is that neuroscience, and specifically the burgeoning field of neuroplasticity, is documenting the great capacity of the brain to change or rewire connections, even those long-standing. This offers hard evidence that each one of us is capable of learning new connections and changing the patterns that our minds take.” This news will give hope to the chronic worrier.

One section of the book provides real-life situations that help the reader “test drive” through “life’s bumps on the road.” In the context of life responses, the reader develops self-awareness. This awareness will help change old, automatic responses of behavior, (like jealousy, anger, hurt, shame, procrastination, perfectionism, difficulty with criticism) into healthier automatic responses.

Chansky is a gifted writer. Her style is clear and entertaining; it’s definitely not a clinical, text book read. She provides illustrations and quotes which add levity and helps the reader understand the concepts she describes.

This book will appeal to anyone who suffers with an anxiety disorder or anyone who knows a life- long ‘worrier’, who is in need of help facing everyday challenges. It’s for the person who just got pink slipped; the friend who needs to steer away from negative thought; or the college kid who needs to sleep better at night.

I highly recommend Freeing Yourself from Anxiety. The book turned me into a believer; anyone at any age can be liberated from stress and achieve greater happiness in his/her life. Freeing Yourself from Anxiety’s breakthrough is focusing on possible thinking, not just positive thinking.

Reference:

ADDA.org

Article first published as TV Review: Roseanne’s Nuts on Blogcritics.

Rosanne Barr, American actress, comedian, Emmy and Golden Globe winner, talk show host and who can forget; the controversial “Star-spangled Banner-off-key-singer”, has an unscripted reality show called “Roseanne’s Nuts” that airs on the Lifetime channel. The offbeat reality show is different from all the others as it shares her new life on her Hawaiian farm and her quest to save the world as well as her soul.

This afternoon, I happened to land on the “Roseanne’s Nuts” marathon and I quickly learned what I’ve been missing all season long. Whether you’re a fan of Roseanne Bar or a nay-sayer, you can’t help but be entertained by the unscripted banter between Roseanne and her musician boyfriend Johnny.

The cast of characters add spice to the wacky plot and (unless you’re missing a funny bone) you can’t help but laugh, chuckle or just shake your head in amusement by her natural wit and the zany dialogue.

Take for example the episode where Roseanne’s son Jake and Johnny discuss with Roseanne her temper. Johnny complains that it can go from zero to sixty in a minute. Her son describes her as being a “possessed woman” spending the afternoon cutting down trees in her tractor. Roseanne doesn’t know what he’s talking about and he again reminds her “You were driving and cussing out the trees!”

Roseanne defends her actions. She believes she has a curse and needs to see Kathy, the island “voo-doo- energy-healer-curse-master”. Johnny senses a whiff of BS about it and tells Roseanne as much but Roseanne is convinced. “I’m getting my curse removed.”

The hilarity continues when we see Roseanne in Kathy’s voo-doo den receiving the “treatment” she has been hoping for. With eyes closed, Roseanne takes deep breaths as Kathy burps and speaks her curse-removal- jargon.

When Roseanne returns home, her boyfriend and son want to prove that it is all one big hoax. They enlist her friend Greg, the local hippie living off the land…well…it’s a tent in the woods…to help them “piss off” their Rosy.

Greg, the hippie, is reluctant at first but decides to help Jake because he wants to prove to Jake Roseanne is truly in control of her temper now. Their plan: Greg is to join the two men in exchanging anti-feminist comments about “a women’s place” to get Roseanne’s goat.

At first, Roseanne resists the bait, but eventually she grows so perturbed that she throws out the whole filming crew telling them “I’m serious. I’m done. Get out…See you Monday.”

This is as real as it gets!

Then, there is the episode where Roseanne comes home with a food truck telling Johnny and Jake that she wants to feed the hungry with her home-grown vegetables. Again, Johnny and Jake scoff at her idea but Roseanne tells them to go out and pick vegetables on her farm. As she drives off to visit her pal Archie (who will “pimp-out” her food truck) Johnny shares with Jake, “Her hearts in the right place but…her brain is a little south of logical.”

Roseanne comes back with the truck she has named “Roseanne’s Kokua Wagon” (kokua means giving in Hawaiian). They fill the food truck with her garden delights and the three characters (Roseanne, Jake and Johnny) drive off aimlessly in search of hungry island people.

Jake becomes bored and tells his mother, “Wake me up when we find hungry people”. Johnny, who is driving the truck, senses Roseanne is becoming discouraged. She wants to save the world and her own soul by doing it and is becoming disheartened. “Where are all the hungry people?” she asks. He reassures his companion, “We can’t give up now.” She looks at him and says, “You are right!…let’s give it five or ten more minutes.”

Roseanne then takes out a blow horn and calls “Are you hungry? Free veggie give away. Step up to the vehicle if you want vegetables for free.” Eventually, the three come to a park where the locals actually approach the food truck and Roseanne is able to feed strangers. At the end of the day, both men apologize for their cynicism and Roseanne is vindicated.

In a serious moment, Roseanne shares with the camera: “I like to help people. It makes me feel real good.” Her philosophy: Everyone can “do what you can do” to solve the world’s big problems.

As she chokes up, she turns to Johnny and asks, “Now that I’ve fed the hungry, do you think I won’t go straight to hell?”

Yep…the lady is nuts…and her cursing might make a hardened marine sergeant blush, but surprisingly,there is also a warm fuzziness about her …although when she senses that it’s being revealed, she’s quick to throw out the sarcastic one-line punches.

I highly recommend tuning in. No team of writers could come up with such original and quirky plot. The banter and funny dialogue is sure to tickle your funny bone. It’s an enjoyable ride when Roseanne takes the wheel.

I received an email from Tony Berkman, CEO of Blog Catalog. In it he shared:

Happy Father's Day!

“In celebration of Father’s Day 2011, I’d like to share our top 10 Father Bloggers with you.” Tony writes:

“Each of these amazing blogs provides us with a glimpse into what the relationship of father means. We find the joy, the tears, the laughter, the heartache and the love and a dedication that is fraught with mishaps.

The “shelf life” of a dad blog is less than that of almost any other type of blog. The reason why is quite apparent once you start to read them. A large number of dads begin their blogs with a sense of excitement, fervor and many out of sheer terror. The new arrival(s) has an almost immedidate impact on dad. The tendency for feeling overwhelmed, fatigued or just the new daddy “wear and tear”  will take it’s toll. It’s evident by both the style and content of blogging and even more apparent based on the number of new dad bloggers that quickly take a “bloggy vacation.”

This clearly is no measure of how great these dads are at fatherhood, yet it is for this very reason that the following 10 Dads are to be given even kudos as both fantastic “bloggers” and outstanding dads.

We hope you enjoy this blogging tribute to dads around the globe.”

©2011 BlogCatalog | 7126 Eckhert Drive | San Antonio TX | 78238

Here is Tony’s top 10 and his description for each Dad Blog:

1. Literal Dan: 

“A sarcastic view on parenting, language, society, and most everything else, from a 20-something stay-at-home dad.”

2. The Dad Jam:

“A place for dads and parents to collaborate on fatherhood and parenting topics and read articles offering advice, tips and tricks from a father of a toddler and a baby. Lots of articles and observations served up with a side of humor. Come join us at the dad jam and start jamming today!”

3. Improvising Fatherhood:

“Improvising Fatherhood is a blog about the comedy of being a dad. Nate Smith is an improvisational comedian, a husband, and a father. He’s not sure which is hardest.”

4. The Dude Knows Best:

“A Dude enjoying the transition from Dude to Dad. A self-proclaimed Neo-Hippie and The Dude of the House for a young family of four, an ever-growing herd of animals, a blossoming landscape, Earth-friendly living, all sorts of household projects, and a healthy addiction to surf.”

5. Big Bad Daddy Rant:

“Ranting about being a man at home with two ShortThings. Asking the eternal question: What is it about kids and the word Poop? All this plus tales of Adversity, Hilarity, and Humility from the damaged mind of the Big Bad Daddy.”

6.The Males Perspective:

“A general blog about daily life from my perspective. I will fill things up with comments on my day, upcoming plans or just my opinion on the goings on around the world.”

7. Puzzling Posts–An Admission of Cluelessness:

“It’s time to concentrate on what I know best (or as you’ll see, least) and talk about being a dad in a world where moms are much more important. Where mom have a much better idea of what they’re doing with a child and where moms don’t make babies watch hockey. A month behind in blogging though we’ll let him slide as there’s a hockey game going on somewhere.”

8. Dorky Dad:

“I’m a dork. I was a dork in high school, but I hated my label so I did everything humanly possibly to de-dork myself. I wore “fashionable” 80s clothes (ick), I bought a car, I even ditched my dork friends for friends lower on the dork-o-meter. I now realize that all this accomplished was to cement my own place in the dork universe. I am now resigned to my fate.”

9. Meta-DAD:

“I’m a Dad. That’s how I define myself at the moment. Not too long ago I defined myself as a Husband, but now I’m a Proud Dad and a Fine Husband. And maybe someday, I will get the title of “Good Dad” – that’s the goal, anyway. I currently enjoy an active readership and have the good fortune of being featured in the Wall Street Journal, USA Today, FOX Business, CNN.Com, the Chicago Sun-Times and Reuters. I am also a Parenting & Family Columnist for the LA Examiner.”

10. Stuff in My Brain:

“Dad talks about his family and embarrasses them at the same time. Sometimes a picture. Sometimes a joke. Always Dad Stuff.”

Thanks Tony!

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Article first published on BrooWaha as “Anne Frank: One Remarkable Girl”

The street sign at the corner of Anne Frank's house

In 2009,I had the wonderful opportunity to visit the Netherlands, not once, but three times. On one of my trips, I was on a mission: I wanted to see Anne Frank’s house.

It was the last day of December and the city of Amsterdam was setting up for that night’s New Year’s Eve celebration. I tried to persuade my traveling companions to help me find Anne Frank’s house, in my hope of “getting in”. One of my friends, born and raised in Amsterdam, was doubtful. My Dutch friend told me; “There will be a line. We’ll never get in.”

I ignored his warning and egged my pals on. Unenthusiastically, they braved the cold and agreed to walk the few blocks. When we got near the corner of what was once Anne Frank’s house (now a museum), I immediately became deflated; There was a long line, going down the street and around the corner of the building. Everyone was waiting in line, and like me, they all wanted to taste a part of Dutch history.

I was willing to wait in the cold, across from the street sign that warned visitors in Dutch, to be careful of pick pockets. Alas, my friends couldn’t be persuaded, and where I was outnumbered, I reluctantly agreed to get a cup of Dutch hot chocolate at a local cafe nearby. Then, we visited a book store, where I purchased a DVD about Anne Frank’s house. It had photographs of Anne Frank and her family, some of which were highlighted on yesterday’s NY Times Home Page.(the Multimedia section, second box, entitled; “Anne Frank’s Childhood”).

I only got to see the house from the outside, but I still felt the trip was worth it. I remember feeling a “chill”, not from the December wind, but by realizing that I was standing on the exact, same street corner that Anne Frank probably skipped down, on her way home from school. It was as if I could “feel” her presence.

Why did Anne Frank’s story make a powerful impression?

I remember reading “The Diary of Anne Frank” in 7^th grade and it made a lasting impression on me. Later on, as a middle school English teacher, I contacted a friend of Otto Frank, who resided on Cape Cod, and invited him to visit my school and talk to my students about the Holocaust and Anne Frank.

He brought old photographs and actual Frank family memorabilia, including the actual wedding table cloth of Otto Frank and other diaries that were never published by Anne Frank. Some of the pages lost and later recovered, were now preserved in glass shadow boxes. Everything had been given to my guest speaker by Anne Frank’s father, Otto Frank.

His visit made the Holocaust “real” to all my students. In fact, my student’s were so moved and affected by his presentation, that in the following weeks, they began bringing books, taken from the library or purchased by them in stores, in to my class. They wanted to show me what they were reading and all of the books focused on the Holocaust and Anne Frank. I had never seen middle school kids so interested in reading and wanting to learn more.

The horrors from that historical period, of occupied Holland, are simply unfathomable to a thirteen or fourteen-year- old. Anne Frank was only fourteen and fifteen, at the time of her diary writing. Being her age, my students tried to identify with her, but had difficulty. They couldn’t imagine being locked in an attic and living in fear, worrying that one day the Nazi’s might kick in the door and take them to a concentration camp.

Her story was incredulous, leaving them awe-struck. They would ask me in class: “How could people do that to other people?” “None of it makes sense and why did they listen to a crazy man named Hitler?” I remember one student in particular, who grew teary eyed watching a documentary video on the subject. She later remarked: “I don’t think I could have endured what Anne Frank had to endure. I don’t know how she ever did it. She was only my age. How did she do it? What causes that kind of hatred? What a waste.”

And maybe stories taken from survivors, those who suffered and watched others die at the hands of the Nazis, is the reason why the chestnut tree, the same one Anne Frank had looked at every day from her attic window where she hid, is getting so much attention today. The New York Times recently published an article on the tree, that collapsed in August, despite being supported by a metal brace.

In the New York Times Article, “A Fight Over Anne Frank’s Fallen Tree” by Sally McGrane, a retired university professor, Helga Fassbinder, was quoted as saying; “This tree was a monument of hope.” For 150 years it stood as a reminder of what was a very dark period for occupied Holland and the world. It was a reminder that Anne Frank’s life was remarkable.

[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVkc-0cI91o&feature=grec_index]

Despite the fact that the tree is now only a memory, this historical period should forever stay ingrained in our minds, in the hope of not repeating the past.

The beauty of Holland and the short life of one remarkable girl impressed me. Even if the tree, outside Anne Frank’s window, died of tree fungus, I know that I’ll never forget Anne Frank’s story, a story shared by too many Holocaust survivors.

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Article first published as The Meaning of Memorial Day on Blogcritics.

Too many people think of Memorial Day as the weekend that kicks off the summer season, but my mother is spending part of the day at the National Cemetery in Bourne, MA, where my father is buried, having served in the Korean War. Let us not forget the true meaning behind Memorial Day.

If you look up the definition of “soldier” in the dictionary, it will say: an enlisted man or woman, a skilled warrior, someone engaged in military service. Why doesn’t it mention bravery, honor or sacrifice?

If you are a history buff and have read the stories about the men who served in Vietnam or today’s men and woman serving in Afghanistan, you realize that the definition of soldier lacks the obvious. These people have superior discipline and are far above average in ability when it comes to having courage and valuing honor.

You may know someone who was a soldier or is presently serving; maybe it’s your son or daughter. I’m sure you are spending today thinking about them and admiring their tenacity and patriotic spirit, or you may be missing them because they never returned home from the war. They made an ultimate sacrifice for the good of their country or for insuring freedom for others.

To listen to an elderly gentleman recall the events of Pearl Harbor or battles he fought in the Pacific, you realize that the individual was probably just a kid himself when he faced these dangers in an unknown land. He might have watched helplessly as a friend slowly died of bullet wounds and he may have a scar or two himself of  where shrapnel was removed from his own body, but he has no regrets for having served. He is one of the brave, the elite, who was called to serve with honor.

So, enjoy today’s cookouts and pool parties and the joy of wearing white again—but never forget the fallen and the men and women who serve in today’s military. Remember to thank them.

SOME WAR STORIES AND WEBSITES WORTH CHECKING OUT:

Dave’s Scrapbook

A fantastically detailed, well written account of Dave’s experiences during the Vietnam War, from the time he received his draft notice to the day he got to go home.

The Vietnam Memorial Wall Web Page

“The Vietnam Veterans Memorial Wall USA website is dedicated to honoring those who died in the Vietnam War. Since it first went on line in 1996 it has evolved into something more. It is now also a place of healing for those affected by one of the most divisive wars in our nation’s history.”

Heroes in the War on Terror

“Since September 2006, the Department of Defense has highlighted the military men and women who have gone above and beyond the call of duty in the Global War on Terror. These are our American Heroes’ stories.”

Heroes of World War II

“Inspiring stories and fascinating details on the 440 American heroes of World War II who were recognized with the Congressional Medal of Honor.”

Fox 3 Aviation and Military Art

He is an acquaintance of mine, who is supremely talented at capturing what combat looks like from the fighter pilot’s perspective,. He has art work that you can enjoy or purchase. Lt. Col Mike McGee, USAF (Ret.) has a collection that is well worth checking out!

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Article first published as Book Review: Someone To Talk To by Joyce Houser M.A., MFT on Blogcritics.

“Someone To Talk To; Understanding How Therapy Heals” (Motivational Press, Inc.) is a book written for anyone who is considering therapy or wanting to understand how therapy works. In the author’s own words; this book is for “anyone who has the courage to hope, and the willingness to work toward emotional healing.”

Joyce Houser, M.A., MFT, is the author who explains psychotherapy in a style that is easily understood. For over 20 years, Houser has been working as a psychotherapist in Santa Monica, California, helping couples and individuals recover from addictions, work through relationship problems or live a more fulfilling life by teaching them to understand childhood traumas and let go of the past.

It is an interesting read that uses Houser’s clinical experience to help the reader understand her points. She shares the stories of past clients (the names have been changed) to illustrate some of the commonalities, the fears and the courage it takes to begin the process of self-healing. She explains to the reader that “Life changes us whether we welcome it or fight it.” And “the person, who attempts to avoid responsibility for change, by making no decisions, is indirectly deciding to stay the same.” By avoiding change, a person will remain “stuck” and this will inevitably interfere with personal growth and happiness. Houser defines psychotherapy as “a way to facilitate change” but admits the decision to begin requires courage; “to take action in spite of being afraid” or being vulnerable to facilitate the healing process.

In her book, Houser explains psychotherapy in ten quick chapters. She takes us step by step through the process but her writing isn’t clinical or text book boring. In explaining the mystery of the unconscious and the human spirit, she writes like a poet: “Like blades of grass pushing their way through cracks in concrete, nature prevails even under the least hospitable conditions. What appears on the surface to be an isolated weed of a problem is not isolated at all. Instead, it’s a messenger from underground, communicating the existence of a subterranean world.”

She writes from personal experience, from the experiences of others, and from her innate ability to understand pain’s purpose. She emphasizes important points by sharing quotes taken from Alice Miller, Scott Peck and others and helps the reader see that “the therapist’s role is to help us in the decoding process.”

Anyone who is considering therapy or has just begun therapy will find encouragement by reading the pages of “Someone To Talk To” and I highly recommend it. It is a fascinating look at the healing process and what it takes to stop destructive patterns and reach our hidden potential or “reach the point where you can experience life on its terms – whatever life gives each day, and working with it.”

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Carl Jung had an interesting concept of individuation and how we form our personal identity. He wrote that our self concept is formed at a very early age and it can be compared to wearing a mask. The persona or public face (mask) is made up of impressions that we receive from other people. In other words, we take in the comments, facial expressions and opinions of others and allow these  “outsiders” to influence and ultimately form our “mask”; what we show to the outside world and who we believe we are.

He also wrote about “shadows” (the dark side of personality) that lie under the surface and although they are living in our subconscious, they can influence our behavior. It’s all very interesting but more than that, his ideas, although dated, remain relevant.

Researchers in child development have proven that our mothers (or primary caregiver) influence our self-concept. Think of the caregiver as the mirror we look into, reflecting our image back to us. If the parent or care giver sends us negative messages, then we are more likely to develop a negative attitude about our own abilities and our self esteem will suffer. Messages sent back from the mirror don’t have to be in the form of “words” that are spoken. It can be in the body language, facial expressions or the person’s willingness to show us love and attention.

Our development is shaped by outside impressions and attitudes and that’s why parenting with “heightened awareness” is so important. What I mean is, what we say to our children is powerful. Words can injure or lift up; destroy or create. Never question the power of words or behavior when it comes to raising children. What we do and say as the parent is forming our child’s identity, whether we want it to or not.

“The little world of childhood with its familiar surroundings is a model of the greater world. The more intensively the family has stamped its character upon the child, the more it will tend to feel and see its earlier miniature world again in the bigger world of adult life.”~Carl Jung

So, what’s the big deal about Personal Development Blogs?

Self-knowledge and identity is not a new concept but the popularity of Personal Development blogs and  the increasing presence of “life coaching” seems to indicate that people are interested in understanding behavior and personal motives. Understanding the “why” behind our actions and interactions can help us stop repeating maladaptive behaviors.

Everyone is interested in achieving their highest potential or at least trying to become a person as we pass through this journey, called life…right? Personal Development Blogs publish content that the reader wants for personal growth and learning. If the reader “connects” with the article (for example,” What He Said: Gender Differences in Communicating” or “11 Natural Stress Busters” ) and the information in the article gives the reader resources or helpful links to learn more on their own, than it’s very likely that the reader will return to that site, wanting to consume more “golden nuggets”.

I was very surprised when my blog was listed in a “top” group for personal development blogs. I didn’t consider that to be my niche. In fact, I’m still trying to figure out what my niche is, as the topics I write about are varied.

My writing (especially in the Motivation or Journal Section of my blog) is written to help me “figure things out.” If my writing “clicks” with a reader and makes the reader “think differently” or become motivated to make a change, then I guess those sections of my blog are related to personal development.

Jung had said: ”

“The growth of the mind is the widening of range of consciousness and…each step forward has been a painful and laborious achievement”

Good personal development blogs help the reader develop some form of awareness. The writer has probably learned lessons by traveling on his own life path filled with cracks. The ultimate gift for the reader is receiving information that helps him or her recover from loss or heart ache. It might provide information that the reader can use to create a change for the better.

Here are some of the best personal development blogs that I’ve found:

Dumb Little Man; Tips for Life

Life isn’t for the faint of heart (Cynthia Occelli)

Story Catcher; notes on being real, being human

Illuminated Mind

The Urban Monk

Change Your Thoughts, To Change Your Life

Chief Happiness Officer

Raptitude; Getting better at being human

Good Life Zen

Jonathan Fields

The Change Blog

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