What is home?~ Anon

The music distracted me. I stopped fighting with my laptop and the windows 7 update disc to listen to the sound coming through my apartment window. Then I remembered; today was the day of the concert. The Gin Blossoms would be playing on the green and the concert was free (something an underemployed person like myself wants to enjoy and take advantage of). So I stopped my cursing ( I hate Vista and lately Toshiba!), put on a baseball cap to hide my lovely “bed-head” dew and didn’t even care if I wasn’t wearing any makeup for I wasn’t out to impress anyone. Despite my “pretty” appearance,

I decided to walk over to the field and check out the talent.

Background information to understand this post:

I moved into Pine Hills in May and hadn’t yet felt like it was my home. I spent most of May through July depressed, missing my house that I lost due to foreclosure (Unemployment with no unemployment assistance took its toll and after I sold my jewelry, went through my savings and retirement; I finally realized I was spitting into the wind. I could no longer afford the home I had lived in for 15 years and had to accept I had lost the fight to keep it.  I was in good company; NBC reported 3 million homeowners had lost their homes this year. So I cried, packed my life into boxes, sold my dining room furniture and other prized  possessions and moved into a one bedroom apartment at Pine Hills.)

Pine Hills is an unusual neighborhood; an eclectic mix of apartments, condos, and homes for the rich and not so famous.  I spent August “pretending” I liked my new digs. I told friends I enjoyed watching golfers play from my kitchen window (the Pine Hills golf course is my back yard) and I thought it was funny having the HGTV Model Green Home a rock throw away from my back door (never understood why there were so many out of state cars driving around at first, but learned later they were there to see the Green home and pay the $12 for the charity tour with Home and Gardens).

I made jokes that my neighbors drove Mercedes or Jaguars and I had an old Jeep Liberty parked in my assigned parking space. I even lied and said I no longer missed my 3 bedroom,colonial style home, with its updated kitchen, cathedral ceiling and two fireplaces. If I ever missed my granite counter tops, I could visit the salad bar at the pine hills supermarket (it had a granite counter…of course !)

Maybe, just maybe, now that September was here I’d begin to accept the fact, that the neighborhood known as the Pine Hills was now my home. But when I walked over to the green, I was just thinking about  taking a break from the computer battle I’d been having all morning. I had no idea my notion of where I hang my hat would change.

Songs are funny things. They can slip across borders. Proliferate in prisons. Penetrate hard shells. I always believed that the right song at the right moment could change history. ~Pete Seeger

Change at last

I sat alone under a tree and started to people watch. I wondered if anyone around me on the green could tell how lonely and sad I was feeling; still looking for full time work that was deserving for someone with a Masters Degree.

History rewritten…Who knew??

Then the band came out and started to sing and suddenly I didn’t care about losing my house or being under-employed. I was listening to song, started to tap my toes and actually felt happy. The band was so good, I forgot how much I hated Vista and my present life, and only marveled at the talent singing a few feet away from me.

(Here’s my Associated Content article on them: Click Kingston 530)

First it was Kingston 530, winners of the 2010 Hard Rock Café Ambassadors to Rock Competition in Boston. They are an Incredible new talent that I’m predicting will be big one day soon. One song they sang in particular I really enjoyed called “Carry On”. It was introduced as a “song for the times” and the singer indicated it was written with this economy in mind. I listened to the lyrics and thought, “Wow, was this guy thinking of  me when he wrote this?” Here’s why:

Words taken from “Carry On”:

“Everybody’s losing, but it aint like their choosing. She’s gotta pack it up because her notice tells her so. Been living there for years now, but the rooms are filled with tears now.
She tried to break it lightly… it’s time for them to go…it’s not about pointing a finger…cuz placing the blame won’t get ya there at all…Know that (she) is not alone…Find a way…Find a way…Find a way to carry on…Dust off your shoes…Find a way to carry on

Then, after they received a standing ovation, they left the stage and out came Diane Birch, another super talent I had never heard of. She’s sung with Daryl Hall from Hall and Oates and appeared on Today and Letterman. Her song, “Nothing but a Miracle” I think must have also been written for me. (Not too proud to admit, I’m still mending a broken heart from a May break up)

Words taken  from “Nothing but a Miracle”:

“Gettin tired of thinking…I got a good mind, so won’t you tell me why I can’t say goodbye…tell me why I’ve been holding on for so long…I gotta get myself together, gotta stop saying I can do no better…Gettin tired of waking up with a lonely heart…I’m gettin tired of giving a damn for an absent hearted man…tell me why I’m holdin on when your love is long gone…

I paid attention to the lyrics which pretty much reminded me there’s a reason why old lovers are filed in memory boxes  labled, “no good” or “the past”.  As she sang in a strong, distinctive style, I listened and actually thought she was helping me to heal.

Finally, the Gin Blossoms came out and I was impressed by how great they still sound singing their old tunes and some new songs from their new CD, NO Chocolate Cake, which is coming out later this month. The music and song was so great, I actually forgot I was sitting alone among strangers wearing no makeup and my old baseball cap.

Words taken from “ Follow You Down”
“Did you see the sky, I think it means that we’ve been lost… I know we’re headed somewhere, I can see how far we’ve come…It’s a long way down when all the knots we’ve tied have come undone… How you gonna ever find your place , Running in an artificial pace, Are they gonna find us lying face down in the sand…So what the hell now, we’ve already been forever damned…

The Gin Blossom’s lead singer had a sense of humor and worked the crowd by handing his tamborine to Gin-Blossom-Wanna-Bees. Each acted like they won a trip to Disney World just for being allowed to shake his simple instrument. One time, the lead singer confessed that for the first time in 15 years he realized (but not until he got out on stage) that he had to go the bathroom really, really badly and now he felt “trapped” performing.  (Okay, a little too much information, but you can’t fault a talented singer for a little over sharing on a sunny, gorgeous, September afternoon.) The second time he mentioned his “uncomfortable” situation, he shrugged his shoulders, took several sips from his beer and  smiled. This made me laugh out loud and that’s when it happened…

It finally hit me.

This place, this Pine Hills, it’s a pretty cool spot. You’ve got the golf course and the green, this area for outdoor movies in July and free concerts; not to mention restaurants, a pool, a gym, your own post office, market, day spa, bank and fire station…yep…it’s a commune… but for the first time in five months I realized I did actually like the place.

I had one of those “A-ha-moments”, like the first time I discovered how great peanut butter tastes when mixed with chocolate and then I made an important decision.

It was time to stop missing the life I once knew and be grateful for the life I have now.

Could it be?

Had I finally adapted to the unfair hits life kept throwing at me? …Maybe …

but who knew it would take listening to three great talents (an awesome up and coming Boston Band, a beautiful girl singing in a New Orleans style harmony and an old beloved 90’s group making a comeback) to kick me in the head and realize it.

The Green at Pine Hills in Plymouth, MA

Walking home from the green, I realized for the first time in almost five months…

I was home.

Thank you  Gin Blossoms, Kingston 530, and Diane Birch…

I guess music has a way to make you think about things differently.

Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life. ~Berthold Auerbach

Footnote:

After publishing this post, I visited my pal, author Don Shapiro’s,  facebook page, and read his most recent insight. He’s working on a book, Life Is A Fork In The Road, and he has been helping so many people by sharing stories and his wisdom. With his permission I’m sharing his latest quote.

If you are like me and are struggling in this economy or in life, I hope his words will bring you comfort or at least offer you a reason to believe there are better days ahead (even if today’s clouds are hiding them from your view)

If you haven’t visited his site, you should check it out. I’m sure in 2 to 3 years when his book comes out, Life Is A Fork In The Road  will be a best seller. You can visit his website at: Don’s website; Life Is A Fork In The Road and check out his facebook page too which you can get to by clicking: Don’s Face Book Page; Life Is A Fork In The Road

Here is the golden nugget taken from his Face Book Page:

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